My Dirty Little Secret
submitted July 19, 2011
I have a dirty little secret like many of you men who are reading this story. By day, I am a married, masculine man. I am married to a wonderful woman who has adored me for twelve years. To her and to my friends, I’m a burly, bearded, talented musician about six feet tall and weighing 200 pounds. They all know me as a gentle, friendly guy. But in private, I’m a closet queer. I don’t like to use the word “gay” because I think that word minimizes what we are; homosexuals. The truth is that I like all things male. I like the looks of a man, his body, his face, and especially, his cock.
I have been queer since I was ten years old. When I started masturbating at that age, I didn’t fantasize about girls and women. I fantasized about boys and men. I wanted to be around males as much as possible. I was a Boy Scout for several years and I loved to go on camping trips where I might see my fellow Scouts swimming naked. I wanted nothing more than to suck all their cocks, but I was too afraid to initiate anything.
I have lived as a straight man all my life with many girlfriends, several wives and stepchildren, but if I had the nerve, I would have preferred to live the “queer life.” I was sexual with all these women and I was a good lover, but I always had a yen for men. More than once I had to use the fantasy of sex with a man to get off with my female lovers.
I started exploring my homosexuality when I was thirty-five. I would go to my favorite adult theater, “The Paradise,” to watch gay porn and have sex. The Paradise is two theaters in one; a straight theater and a gay theater. Most of the patrons start in the straight theater, but within minutes they migrate to the gay theater. This is where I got all my illicit sex.
One night I was at the theater looking for something. I’m always nervous about having anonymous sex, but I do like to watch other guys doing it. That particular night, there was one guy who was trying to suck off every guy who was willing and he got quite a few takers. I had my cock out and I masturbated while I watched the action, but I stopped when I got close to cumming. To my surprise, an old man, about seventy years old, appeared beside me with a paper cup in his hand.
“Do you want some head,” he whispered, leaning over.
“No thanks,” I answered, “I’m just here to watch.”
“Are you sure,” he asked. “Look at this.”
When I turned to face him, he opened his mouth in a big, toothless grin He had no teeth; just pretty pink gums. I had always heard that a blowjob from a toothless cocksucker was the best experience in the world, so I was intrigued by the thought. However, I wanted to remain cautious. I shook my head.
“No, thank you.”
He put his cup down and sat there quietly studying my softening cock. I focused my attention for a few minutes on the cocksucker working the crowd, so I jumped when I felt a tug on my penis. I turned to the old man.
“Can I touch your cock,” he asked.
He had already laid his hand in my lap to massage my limp cock. He stroked down the length of it and used his thumb and forefinger to caress the head. God, it did feel good and I started firming up again. Within minutes, I was rock hard and he shifted around to use his fist to stroke my turgid cock. I alternated between watching the cocksucker deep-throating his clients and my new friend stroking my meat. Eventually, he squeezed out a pearl of pre-cum from the pee-slit. I was definitely going over the top. The old man smeared the pre-cum over the head of my cock with his forefinger. His ministrations were driving me crazy and I finally lost all reservations. I unbuttoned my pants and stood up quickly to pull them down with my underwear.
“Oh, yeah,” he whispered as he rolled off his chair and dropped to his knees.
He swallowed the length of my cock down to the base and clamped down on the shaft. His soft gums on my hard cock felt exquisite! Then he used his free hand to push two fingers up my asshole. Heaven! I jumped like I’d been touched with a cattle prod. Our movements in that little theater soon caught the attention of the other patrons and within seconds, we had assembled a crowd of masturbating perverts all around us. I looked up to study the faces of our admirers; they nodded back approvingly. Lost in the moment and obviously temporarily insane, I stopped the old man long enough to kick off my shoes and pull my pants and underwear completely off. I was praying that a cop wouldn’t walk in on us and cart me off to jail. There I was with my clothes in a crumpled pile, naked from the waist down, getting a blowjob from a man twice my age with at least five men masturbating around us. It was exciting and kinky. And risky!
As the masturbators got near the edge, they leaned forward and blasted wads of cum on the old man’s back, his head, and each other. The scene was too much! He finger-fucked my asshole like a like it was tight pussy; I wanted him to use his whole fist. I felt my asshole clench around his fingers as I blasted my own cumshot down his throat. Unfazed, he increased his tempo on my cock and sucked every last drop out of me as I writhed helplessly in my chair like a twitching whore.
When I finished cumming, he gently pulled his fingers out of my ass, rocked back on his haunches and reached for his cup. Then he leaned forward so I could watch him spit a mouthful of my cum into the cup. So, that’s how it was used! He showed me the contents of the cup and it was almost full of sperm from several satisfied donors. Kind of gross, but still a turn-on.
After a few minutes, the old man nodded, patted my naked thigh, and disappeared in the darkness. I sat there for a while watching the other patrons jack-off and suck each other. I was too exhausted to move, but I knew that I should get dressed and get out of that place. I was still basking in my post-orgasmic haze. One guy holding his erection in his hand asked me if he could fuck me and, honestly, if we were alone, I might have let him. However, I wasn’t, as of yet, ready to take that risk. I just shook my head, “No.” I finally got my wits about me, pulled on my clothes, and stumbled out of the theater.
On the drive home to my wife I reviewed in my mind the events of the evening. I had gone to great extremes to have sex with a man that I didn’t even know. And, given the opportunity, I would do it again. In fact, I will do it again because I am a homosexual.
But I won’t tell my wife or my friends…I keep that as “.”